Important Things, Naturally

What it is, reader.

1. Though I didn't think it was possible to like Bradley Cooper less than I do (no, seeing Silver Linings Playbook didn't help AT ALL. That Oscar nom is so shockingly undeserved) today I read this little nugget in Jezebel that caused me to run screaming for the brain bleach: "... during sex, Bradley Cooper talks nonstop in French..." Lord, help me.

2. I only just realized, after a Twitter kerfuffle broke out between writers Goldie Taylor and Joan Walsh over a misquote of the former by the latter (article here), and only after it was pointed out by two different writers, that all of Salon's political writers are white. This is a site I read almost every day! How did I not even notice this? White privilege, that's how. Resolution: pull own head out of own ass, more often.

3. Did we all hear that Saturday US Postal Service delivery is ending in August? Are we okay with this? I think I am.

4.  I suck at keeping salad ingredients in the house. Lettuce is a huge pain in my ass, even the pre-washed bagged kind. The greens invariably turn to revolting, stringy liquid in my refrigerator yet I still crave a cold, crunchy and healthy side for sammies. My salvation? Red cabbage slaw, the perfect salad for lazy mofos. Here's what you do:

1. Start with a tupperware the appropriate size for the finished salad. You are making the damn thing in the storage container, friend! I use a 5 cup container and can eat this over 4-5 days.
2. Fill the container about 2/3 full of chopped red cabbage. If you're using a 5 cup container, this is about half of a smallish red cabbage. The way you chop it is important--if you keep the pieces long and dangly, they will fling dressing all over your shirt as you eat. Learn from my experience and don't do it like that.
3. Grate a medium-ish carrot right into the container. That's right, plunk your box grater right over the pile of cabbage and grate away.
4. Add olive oil, balsamic and salt. I do not measure. Use your God-given senses. Mix it with a fork. Hopefully, you heeded my advice about not overfilling the cabbage otherwise there's a mess all over your kitchen counter right now.
5. Finally, and this step is critical for maximum deliciousness: addition of toasted sesame seeds or toasted pine nuts. You must toast them. Do not think of not toasting them. You know I would not take this step if it didn't make a huge difference, right?  Here's what you do: grab a handful of sesame seeds or pine nuts. Spread them on a piece of foil lining your toaster oven tray. Press the "toast" button. Don't let them burn. Let them cool. Dump into salad.
6. This salad gets yummier as it sits and since it is not princessy lettuce, go about your business.
7. I assume this is really good for you though I have never checked. Too lazy.