Prayer of Thanksgiving

Oh heavenly Creator
though I generally don't believe in your presence,
certainly not as a Benevolent Creator,
otherwise why would you allow such shitty things to happen?

Deadly tsunami,
oil tankers crashing into the Bay Bridge,
people that voted for George Bush,
especially the second time,
high waisted pants,
olive loaf--
I don't need to go on.

In your infinite wisdom, you giveth
my downstairs neighbor
Cracky McCracken.
Severely testing my love of humankind,
which I didn't have much of to begin with,
pushing the limits of compassion for the enraged,
drug-addicted,
domestically violent
asshole.

In the dark of the darkest night,
kept awake by "mgmhmmgmg FUCK YOU!
ghfuthdhdfhfytrI SAID FUCK YOU!
mghdjffhshaddBITCH!"
I was without hope.

Then lo! One day Cracky's blinds were wide open.
Bright light permeated the dank gloom.
The fridge door hung open while the super swept.

Cracky was taketh away.

And for this I give thanks.