Friday, March 09, 2007

Really, Salma?

The stunning Salma Hayek, one of my most favorite people to look at, is with child. I had no idea she was even dating anyone. Doesn't she always attend Hollywood events with Penelope Cruz as her date? But apparently she is engaged to some megabucks geriatric. Okay, I must check myself. He is 44 and she is 40. But Perez had a pic on his site in which he looks 70. I did find a better picture of him. Cute, but really not in the league of Salma. But few are, no?

Certainly none of the ladies on this cycle of America's Next Top Model. Despite this cycle of girls being somewhat lackluster, this show has its hooks in me. I am fascinated by the transformation into these insane high couture peacocks, virtually unrecognizable as the mousy girls they were before. I love J Alexander, who has got to be the biggest freak on network television. Last week J, dressed in pigtails and a Catholic schoolgirl plaid skirt, taught the girls how to runway walk on an outdoor track, in stilettos. The girls were falling all over themselves but J strutted like the queen she is. Classic stuff. Even though Tyra's ego just gets bigger and bigger each cycle, nearly threatening to eclipse the entire show, I can forgive it. We're living in a time where it is acceptable for female media moguls like Oprah, Martha and Rachael Ray to put themselves on the cover of their magazines every single month. I guess it must be equally acceptable for Tyra to decorate every available wall of her models' shared home with pictures of ... Tyra.

I'll end by saying that I'm quite pleased with myself tonight. First, I successfully avoided a ticket for not coming to a full stop at a stop sign, though the cranky motorcycle cop was well within his rights to issue that citation, as I was in lala land eating baby carrots as I rolled through the stop sign and didn't even see him until his face was practically plastered against my window. Two, I parked at a meter today that had 53 minutes left, thus avoiding the need to deplete my precious stash of quarters, needed for dust mite control laundry. And three:

Unfinished wood cigar box from Michael's: $3.99
Can of stain, can of polyurethane, sandpaper: Already sitting in my closet, who remembers how much it was?
Two foam brushes: $1.69
One piece of black self-adhesive felt: $1.29
Having a place to store jewelry that is not a pink plastic party favor from some girl's Bat Mitzvah in 1984: Priceless

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