Monday Miscellany

What it is, reader! Hope everyone had a safe 4th with all digits intact. Things were all good over here at Professional Critic. Though a minute ago one of my neighbors got hauled off by the popo as he was unable to stop screaming, "I'll kill you, motherfuckers," for the better part of a half hour in that slurred nearly incoherent way of the drug addled and/or deeply disturbed. It's a half way house of some kind so police visits are not at all unusual though not usually this dramatic.

In lighter news, I have started feeding my furry miscreants a raw diet. We started off with a chicken salmon formula, and since it is one of the more reasonably priced varieties, they wanted to have nothing to do with it. Now they eat THE BUNNY and everyone seems happier. It does take some getting used to, you know, seeing blood pool in their bowls but my main reason for doing this has been achieved: the poo no longer stinks. It almost doesn't smell at all. I don't understand why this is, but since the litterbox is in my kitchen, I'm happy. Oh yeah, the health benefits, yada yada, since the stupidly expensive kibble I was buying these fools wasn't good enough.

Here is the cute baby animal du jour, brought to you by our friends at Fuck You, Penguin, and it's a doozy:

I can haz bebeh otter?